Holby City. Series 14 episode 13. Hide Your Love Away.

After last weeks beacon of sexual tension, Holby City began to delve in the world of… love… Apparently… 

Greg is suffering from the after effects from a dreadful hangover (I wonder where the writers got that idea from), and is late for work again, which doesn’t go down well with the Naylor who sympathetically and understandingly tells him “You look like crap.” It begins with Hanssen demanding a board room meeting, with all of Darwin’s staff and one each from the other wards, is this favouritism writers?

Ah, Sahira Shah The Registrar… she can light up a room with just her presence, providing that Jac sets her on fire first. Unfortunately, Sahira didn’t stick around long enough for Jac to put her master plan into action, as she went to collect her ill, miraculously growing, son from school – it is clear that she doesn’t care about her other son/daughter (she has said both) as they seem to be a ghost in her life. Jac should call social services on her. Elliot’s main part in this episode was to struggle getting down the stairs. Such fun!

Then, news came of a nasty car crash involving a son and mother, and a child with a coat labelled Indie was taken into the hospital, whom Jac operated on. Greg was frantic, fearing the worst, and, after heaving an update that the woman in the car was dead, absolutely went mad that the women he supposedly “loved” may be a bloodied corpse lying in the wreckage on the road. Greg and Hanssen were fretting about Sahira, Elliot was fretting that he would never get to eat a dark chocolate cupcake (turned weapon) again, and Jac was annoyed that everyone was busy fretting rather than doing their job and suturing arteries.

However, with fake sighs of relief, Sahira and Indie were both fine. They simply just happened to be at the accident, helping out and Sahira just happened to give the child Indie’s coat to where. What are the chances of that happening, eh? Greg and Sahira ended up doing a “bit of the kissing” (after having the most vicious cupcake battle of the century) and swallowing each other whole which Jac took great pleasure in (nearly) watching…. So close… but she achieved her goal of finally getting them to knuckle down and do some suturing.

Chantelle (again) attempted to be more efficient in her job, because Malick (again) said so. Obviously, this was never going to work and she seemed to have sudden mood swings throughout the entire episode. Nice, Efficient, Nice, Efficient, Nice, Efficient, Nice… is there something you aren’t telling us Nurse Lane, is there a bun in the oven? Or champagne in the mini fridge? Hanssen seemed to think so.

Also, down on AAU, Freida Petrenko’s first impression with Luc didn’t go to well at all, after she heard he was the reason for Eddi’s transfer to another ward. Dr Hemmingway was unimpressed with his first experience of the Ukrainian doctor. “Ukrainian. Six words for cabbage and not one for excuse me.” He said brusquely. Fortunate for him, she didn’t report him for racism.  

капуста – Cabbage in Ukrainian. You learn something new thing every day.

Finally, the big, scary, strict man thought that Holby deserved a Foundation Trust Status and Hanssen decide to celebrate on his own with his mini bottle of champagne that he got all to himself. Smart arse.

Sherlock. Series 2 episode 2. The Hounds of Baskerville.

Ah Sherlock, the mind-boggling, hard-to-understand British television show about a private detective and his PA/friend/army doctor.

The start of the episode sees Sherlock frantically searching for his secret storage of cigarettes, whilst Watson sits in a chair reading. Oh this is the life! It does seem that Mr Holmes has a new obsession with pointy objects… more specifically a harpoon, which at that point of time the viewers dismissed as one more weapon in his residence, without pondering the question of where it came from? A mystery I’m pretty sure the clever writers will never reveal. Mrs Hudson seemed very angry about the presence of this weapon, saying: “Perhaps you can put away your harpoon.” Dirty minds on! Not a euphemism I hope.

Sherlock was agitated because of his lack of good cases, so he accepts an offer from a little girl that had wrote to him about the unexplained kid-napping of her rabbit – it looked like there was no force entry of the hutch. The mystery deepens! It also seems that the rabbit was fluorescent, which would be pretty handy as you could use it for a torch. As the mystifying captor remains unrevealed, Sherlock travels to the military base of Baskerville to discover more. There he meets his client’s mother, a gene scientist there, who reveals that she took the rabbit that was named “Bluebell.” Unfortunately, Bluebell was never found, and the pure child remained miserable.

Oh yes, and there was a man searching for the hound that apparently killed his father, but it turned out that the hound was imaginary – brought about by the hallucinogenic fog. And while Sherlock was searching for the hound, it seemed likely that the man would suddenly transform into a werewolf… except that never happened. But that’s not as interesting as the rabbit story as I’m sure you would agree.

Also, Microsoft Mycroft had a texting spree with his brother, but Sherlock rudely didn’t reply! Well… he was kind of busy breaking into a military base with a fake ID card, but he should learn to respect his elders… even if he doesn’t share his brothers interest in computers.

Casualty. Series 26 episode 17. Duty of Care.

After the dramatic events of the fire of the last episode of Casualty, the doctors are taking a well-deserved, relaxing break from the high-octane world of R.T.A’s and hazardous situations… or so us ignorant viewers thought. Helicopter rides, car pile ups, explosions, toxic waste… where to start?

The doors open at the brand new emergency department, a very yellow brand new emergency department, and the team seem ready for anything.

However, Dylan Keogh is very perturbed as the staff are gossiping about his not-a-secret-anymore marriage to Sam, and Zoe, for some reason, feels that she needs an explanation even though she was never together with Dylan, but obviously fancies him. Dr Keogh does his social-reluctance thing when he discovers a picture of him and Sam on their wedding day pinned up in the staff room. Naughty Nurses!

Noel has taken a leaf out of Joseph Byrne’s book as he seems very attached to his new canary desk, and, being who he is, the flat-screen television. Thoughtfully, Big Mac has organised a special “thing” to reward Scarlett for recklessly running into a burning building and saving patient’s lives. He bought her a cup. End of. People say that it's the thought that counts. In this case... it isn't.

Oh no! Disaster! A car crash! Isn’t it always the way? This time, it was caused by a dog and a little girl, but, thankfully, the dog didn’t get hurt. It was a beautiful dog. Dixie, Jeff and Sam are called to the scene. Sam is hurt about what Dylan said about their “miserable” marriage, so she puts herself in danger purposely throughout the entire episode.

This also sees the entrance of the new paediatric doctor Tom Kent, who soars in army-style in a flashy helicopter, and the clever Tommy-boy (that is what I am going to call him for any future references) is afraid of flying. Very smart mate. Practically a genius. Nick Jordan is ecstatic to see the flying-thingie and dances like a little girl every time he sees it, which bemuses Zoe exceptionally… well not really, but you get the idea. Nick had offered Tom a job before, but the dashing Mr Kent had turned it down as he wanted to “fly solo” - which is a bit stupid because, as I said before, he is afraid of flying.

Then Jordan makes the mistake of saying something along the lines of “What else could happen?” That’s when all the viewers new that Holby was doomed.

There were far too many characters to go into great detail about them, but I’m pretty sure Tess is practically responsible for the damage to the gas pipe, which some clever person decides to light a cigarette right next to. BOOM! EXPLOSION! BOOM! SMOKE! CASUALTIES! BOOM! BURNS! BOOM BOOM BOOM!

Suddenly, there is hydrochloric acid involved as well, and the public, after been repetitively told to stay inside, what do they do? Run. Scream. Flee. Aww, don’t you just love the human race? Sam decides to stay behind, helping an injured man, but the acid cloud catches up with her and she has to run. Meanwhile, Dylan is worried sick, bless him, and Zoe notices. Is this a bit of jelous-itus me thinks?

Fortunately, alls well it ends well, until a patient (who happens to be DC Chris Skelton from Ashes to Ashes) corners Dylan and lunges at him, but here comes action women Sam and puts him in a headlock. (What would the Guv say if he saw him getting beaten by a girl?)

At the end of the episode, Tom realises that he made a mistake and accepts the job offer from an overexcited Jordan, thinking that he will get to see the helicopter more. Unfortunately, he is wrong, and that ends the rein of the Holby Heli.

Holby City. Series 14 episode 12. The Hangover Strikes.

After last weeks dramatic journey to the Ukraine, we were back in the safe, calm hospital of Holby City where, in this episode, the place was sizzling with sexual tension.

I can see the longing smiles of adoration as this episode sees the enlightenment of young Oliver Valentine as he finally realises that he just can’t live without the high-octane world of cardio-thoracic surgery, and not to mention a certain Ginger Ninja who enjoys putting him in place. Not only is he bored of Dull Dan The Yeo Valley Man blathering on in his ear about his not-so-successful- marriage to Chrissie and his longing for gay material, but Oliver is less than keen to fulfil he role as the “bone-monkey” in the “meat-head” department as so compassionately put by le Naylor.  

When Jac saw how well Oliver had developed in cardiothoracic surgery, and, after sending her new F1 to the wet lab to deal with some magnificent price porkers, she couldn’t help but alluring invite him into surgery with her, to which Oliver confessed that Jac had much better legs than Dull Dan. Obviously.

Over the operating table was an obvious sign of casual flirting between the pair as they made Bambi eyes to each other, and Oliver (for once) was superior in theatre. There is defiantly an attraction there. Whilst Oliver was geeking out about how an inflow occlusion was practically medieval, the viewers glimpsed signs of an emotion and a smile on Jac’s face. Could she be… proud??? Or was there more to it then that?

At the end of the episode, young Oliver Valentine told his ex-mentor and ex-fling that he wanted to come back to her… (In both ways…) To which she responded by firing her F1 in true Naylor style after announcing that she couldn’t shake the image of him crying like a little girl, and accepting Valentino back with open arms… nearly…

On AAU, Eddi Mckee was nursing the after effects of a dreadful hangover (as the title describes lovingly), after climbing on top of Luc’s caravan that has suddenly appeared out of nowhere in the grounds of the hospital, on which she caught sight of the awkward, non-drinker half-naked in his bed. It seems that he was spending New Years Eve alone, as was the Naylor who looked quite depressed reading in her office (Probably missing a certain GP hunk in Penrith.)

So, the next day, Eddi and Luc argue over how to treat an alcoholic patient who happens to be the daughter of the women that Jac and Ollie were treating (Who saw it coming, eh?), and the tension is too much to bear so Eddi decides to take a break and transfer wards.

Ah, and now we come to Sahira Shah and the Irish charmer that is Greg Douglas. After coming too terms with the shock from Elliot’s horrible choice of clothes, Greg decides that, instead of giving up his “dirty habit” of shagging everything that moves, that he would give up smoking for his new year’s resolution. Conveniently, there is a professional hypnotist on the ward, who, after taking a hefty bribe, seemingly hypnotised him to do so. However, naughty Sahira asked the hypnotist to get Greg to be super nice to a pain in the neck patient, who may or not be the mystery shopper. Mr Douglas, being who he is, played along for some unknown reason, so it was revealed that the hypnotism didn’t work. Shame, we could have trained him to cut apples with Hanssen.

To be honest, Sahira is just there to give the Swedes tongue a well deserved holiday, and to explore Greg’s character, who likes her because she’s a woman.